As usual, Nancy's critical acumen is helpfully forcing me to sharpen my admittedly vague and diffuse query. Question: in ways analogous to how the decontextualized venues of CMC seem to allow for more aggressive forms of communication - and forms of communication that are themselves decontextualized (e.g., the sharp reply sent not simply to a friend who might know the author well - but also to a range of strangers who have no experience with the author and hence have less ability to interpret his/her meaning, tone, etc.) - is it possible that such e-mail venues as I described might foster less judicious rhetoric (e.g., language use, etc., that one would never use face-to-face) that is thus more likely to be destructive of relationships? I really don't know! My query was sparked by discussion today with friends, in which two different examples of such destruction - severing of e-mail connections as well as reduction of f-2-f engagements with one another - were noted. Again, two examples hardly a generalization make - but at least help occasion a query? Still curiously, Charles Ess Distinguished Research Professor, Interdisciplinary Studies Drury University 900 N. Benton Ave. Voice: 417-873-7230 Springfield, MO 65802 USA FAX: 417-873-7435 Home page: http://www.drury.edu/ess/ess.html Co-chair, CATaC: http://www.it.murdoch.edu.au/catac/ Exemplary persons seek harmony, not sameness. -- Analects 13.23
From: Nancy Baym <nbaym@ku.edu> Reply-To: air-l@aoir.org Date: Sun, 20 Apr 2003 20:40:35 -0500 To: <air-l@aoir.org> Subject: Re: [Air-l] e-mail destroying friendships?
Charles ponders whether email is destroying friendships...
Sounds to me like politics are destroying friendships. Is there anything radically different in the scenario Charles poses than a person who raises politics at a party, leading to disagreement, perhaps vehement, and no more party invitations for some of the arguers? Face-to-face communication is clearly the biggest threat to relational survival there is -- almost every relationship that ever gets started ultimately falls apart via f2f communication. But we don't even think to blame face-to-face interaction for their downfall. As an interpersonal communication teacher, I have yet to be convinced there is anything profoundly different about email's role in relationships. Communication builds friendships. Communication destroys friendships. Email is a communication medium. Why wouldn't email destroy friendships as well as help build them?
Nancy
-- Nancy Baym http://www.ku.edu/home/nbaym Communication Studies, University of Kansas 102 Bailey Hall, 1440 Jayhawk Blvd., Lawrence, KS 66045, USA Association of Internet Researchers: http://aoir.org
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