From: "noci" <nochi@gmx.net> Date: Tue, 22 Jan 2002 00:05:03 +0100

the interesting questions there: is the "online self" different from the "real" self?

I think it's also important to ask what it means to have a 'real' self. In the physical world, i exhibit a wide variety of aspects of myself to a wide variety of people, given a particular context. The language, mannerisms, dress, and attitude i exhibit at work differs tremendously from that which i exhibit on a Saturday night at a NYC club. Are these two different selves or just different facets of my 'self'? I believe that we have a strong sense of self, even if particular characteristics can be conflicting and confusing (Saturday night behavior/beliefs versus church behavior/beliefs). We exhibit certain aspects of our self to certain people during certain interactions. This doesn't make our self any less real, just controlled (or 'performed') for a particular purpose, even if that purpose is simply fitting social norms. For example, while someone may be a mother, she probably will not speak to you in mommy-language at a business meeting, not because she's trying to hide her motherhood, but because the performance isn't socially appropriate. In the same way, i would suggest that online is just another context, with different norms and different ways of performing one's self. For example, in the physical world, we have to work with the characteristics of our self that are written on the body, while those are not readable online. Consequently, we pay much more attention to the qualities that are given through avatars, language or email/pseudonyms, trying to derive basic social information about the people out there (i.e. sex, age, location, values, etc.). Just as we hide/lie about certain personal characteristics in the physical world (how old are you, really?), we do the same online. Sometimes this is malicious; sometimes, it's purely entertaining; sometimes, it's unintentional. I guess i hesitate to think of the online sphere as tremendously different, just another context with slightly different rules/options. Please disagree with me because i am really interested in this conversation... danah